Wednesday, March 30, 2011
Netflix WI: The IT Crowd
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| I came here to drink milk and kick ass. And I've just finished my milk. |
EASILY THE FUNNIEST TELEVISION SHOW SINCE THE ORIGINAL BRITISH VERSION OF THE OFFICE. YOU KNOW IT'S GOOD WHEN YOU LAUGH YOUR ASS OFF THE THIRD TIME AROUND. WATCH THIS BEFORE YOU DIE.
Tuesday, March 29, 2011
Theater: Sucker Punch
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| We're here for the gang bang. |
AS TECHNOLOGY IMPROVES, THE LINE BETWEEN VIDEO GAMES AND MOVIES IS BECOMING BLURRY. THAT IS NOT ALWAYS A BAD THING. VIDEO GAMES MAKE UP THEIR OWN RULES, AND SO DOES SUCKER PUNCH. IF YOU DON'T LIKE SEXY WOMEN, SLOW MOTION ACTION, AND MOVIES THAT MAKE YOU THINK, THEN WATCH THE KING'S SPEECH AND STOP BITCHING ABOUT ZACH SNYDER.
Tuesday, March 22, 2011
DVD: Dead Man Walking
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DEAD MAN WALKING WILL TAKE YOU ON AN EMOTIONAL RIDE THAT WILL FLIP YOUR BELIEF SYSTEM ON ITS ASS. ALSO, IF YOU HAVEN'T SEEN MILK, 21 GRAMS, MYSTIC RIVER, OR CARLITO'S WAY, IT WILL CONVINCE YOU THAT SEAN PENN IS THE GREATEST ACTOR OF HIS GENERATION.
Monday, March 21, 2011
Theater: Paul
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| Comic-Con holds a special screening for a Natalie Portman nipple-slip. |
IF YOU HAVE EVER SEEN A MIDNIGHT SHOWING OF AN LOTR MOVIE OR CAN RECOGNIZE THE CANTINA MUSIC FROM MOS EISLEY IN THE FIRST FEW BARS, THIS MOVIE IS FOR YOU. IF YOU DON'T FIT INTO THAT CATEGORY, THEN YOU CAN SUCK IT.
Friday, March 18, 2011
BluRay: Kick-Ass
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| Why the hell is Nic Cage in this? And what's with the John Holmes mustache?! |
I HAD FORGOTTEN JUST HOW DARK THIS MOVIE REALLY IS, AND THAT IS WHAT SAVES IT FROM BEING AN ALL-TOO-EASY FANBOY JERKFEST. THE ACTION SEQUENCES ALONE ARE WORTH WATCHING A FEW TIMES OVER. ALSO, THE MOVIE
SHOULD HAVE BEEN CALLED HIT-GIRL.
Thursday, March 17, 2011
Netflix WI: Cowboy Bebop-The Movie
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| Just released press photo of Cowboy Bebop 2: Trannyspotter |
THIS MOVIE IS JUST TOO COOL. I DON'T USUALLY GO FOR THE ANIME FARE, BUT THE NOIRISH FEEL, HUMOR, AND BADASS ACTION SEQUENCES
OF BEBOP TURN ME INTO A MANGA NERD
EVERY TIME I WATCH IT.
Monday, March 14, 2011
Theater: The Adjustment Bureau
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| It's not that I thought God would be white, but holy sh-t he's purple. |
THIS IS A FILM THAT PEOPLE WILL EITHER IDENTIFY WITH ON A DEEP LEVEL OR PICK APART FOR ITS SUPERFICIAL INCONTINUITIES. IF YOU HAVE EVER DECIDED TO CHANGE COURSE AT A CROSSROADS IN YOUR LIFE, THIS MOVIE WILL SPEAK TO YOU.
Friday, March 11, 2011
BluRay: Stranger Than Fiction
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| Will somebody out there please notice my acting skills for once?!?! |
THIS IS THE I HEART HUCKABEES FOR WRITERS. IF PEOPLE GAVE SMART, INSIGHTFUL MOVIES LIKE THIS A CHANCE, WE WOULD SEE LESS AND LESS
CRAP AT THE THEATER.
Thursday, March 10, 2011
Blu Ray: The Thomas Crown Affair '99
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| "I didn't say you could put it there." |
A SLICK AND SEXY REMAKE OF THE 1968 MCQUEEN FILM. THIS CAT AND MOUSE CAPER IS WELL WORTH THE TRIP TO THE VAULT.
Wednesday, March 9, 2011
Netflix WI: Frozen
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| Iceman is a bitch. |
DECENT ACTING AND DIALOGUE BUT THE PREMISE DOESN'T HAVE A BROKEN LEG TO STAND ON. WATCH IF YOU ARE CURIOUS TO SEE WHAT IT IS LIKE TO BE EATEN ALIVE BY WOLVES. OTHERWISE, STEER CLEAR.
Tuesday, March 8, 2011
TV: An Idiot Abroad (Science Channel)
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| Karl Pilkington struggles to understand the worlds around him. |
IF YOU ARE A FAN OF THE RICKY GERVAIS SHOW PODCAST OR HBO CARTOON, THIS IS A GREAT CHANCE TO SEE KARL PILKINGTON IN ACTION. IF NOT, THIS WILL BE RATHER DULL.
Monday, March 7, 2011
Theater: RANGO
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| Finally, a movie made for movie lovers. |
JOHNNY DEPP AND ILM CREATE AN ENTHRALLING UNIVERSE THAT YOU WILL CARE ABOUT AND
GIVE YOU SOME GREAT LAUGHS ALONG THE WAY.
THIS ONE'S NOT REALLY FOR THE KIDS.
Thursday, March 3, 2011
Netflix WI: Freakonomics
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| The numbers don't lie, Steve. Every time somebody laughs at Larry the Cable Guy, a baby dies. |
ALTHOUGH I WOULD LIKE TO BELIEVE THAT FINDING THE ANSWERS TO THE GREAT QUESTIONS IS A LIFELONG PURSUIT THAT CAN'T BE CIRCUMVENTED THROUGH NUMBER CRUNCHING, THIS MOVIE IS A GREAT STUDY IN CAUSE AND EFFECT THAT WILL HAVE YOU SCRATCHING YOUR HEAD FOR DAYS AFTERWARD.
Wednesday, March 2, 2011
TV: Out of the Wild (Discovery HD)
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| The entire Channing Tatum fan club (pictured above) makes it a point to go on regular group hikes. |
WHAT'S BETTER THAN MAN VS. WILD AND SURVIVORMAN? WATCHING REGULAR PEOPLE TRY TO DO THAT SH*T.
Tuesday, March 1, 2011
Theater: Drive Angry 3D
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| I'm gonna have to show some serious skin to sell this thing. |
TOO CRAZY AND RIDICULOUS TO GIVE A STRONG RECOMMENDATION BUT I'LL SAY I HAD A GOOD TIME AT THE MOVIES.
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